Slow Road to Fit
From Founder & CEO Brent Beshore’s 2024 Annual Letter
Last year’s letter TLDR: I peaked at 252 lbs and started 2023 at an out-of-shape 235 lbs. I lost 30 lbs last year and put on 10 lbs of muscle. Everything about how I ate and exercised changed. The results were slow, but steady.
I said the following in last year’s letter, which is pertinent to the story: “I wanted to try to get off all substances and see how I felt. I had already been off caffeine. Dropped alcohol beyond celebrations. No allergy meds. Not even an Advil when I was sore.”
This year I just kept at it through the first six months of the year and dropped another 5-7 lbs. Then progress started slowing dramatically. At 41, with a demanding career, some unexpected turbulence at work, and four kids, including a baby, it got hard to stay focused. Exercise was steady thanks to the “sweat every day” lifestyle change I’ll tell you about below. But, I hopped on and off the struggle bus with sustaining a 250-500 calorie per day deficit. Experience has taught me that losing weight is a magnitude order more difficult than maintaining.
I tried to understand what was going on and consulted a number of experts. What I learned was that we have two hunger mechanisms that interact: System 1 and System 2. System 1 sets your appetite based on your recent (2-4 days) caloric load and needs. If you overeat in a given period of time, your body nudges you to eat less temporarily. This is why you tend not to over-eat the days following Thanksgiving. The opposite is also true. If you diet, this system is going to rev up. I knew this, as I had experienced it since about day 3 of my journey. In my experience, it’s hard, but straightforward in muscling through it with enough protein and some distractions.
System 2 is more complicated and interacts with System 1. System 2 is a long-term system that adjusts your hunger based on your energy balance over the previous 6-12 months. System 1 is concerned with making sure you can fuel your lifestyle, while System 2 is concerned with you trending towards literal starvation. The more you lose, the more active System 2 gets. If you lose a meaningful amount of body fat, no matter your recent intake, it will override your System 1. This is why body builders coming out of a hard cut are almost uniquely able to put on body fat quickly after the show.
I experienced this phenomenon in a way that shocked me. No matter what I put in my mouth and no matter what combination of protein, fat, and carbs, I couldn’t get rid of this deep ache. It was a constant distraction. And, I naturally ate more in response, slowing or stopping my weight loss. My temporary solution was to exercise more. I started doing at least 90 minutes/day of cardio, and sometimes far more. My body started to hurt all the time, which became its own distraction. And I learned about this delightful phenomena called Exercise Energy Compensation, which still is not fully understood by scientists, but shows that the body can adjust down your non-exercise caloric needs up to 600 calories per day. Said differently, your body will compensate for exercise beyond a point and it’s a waste calorically speaking.
Then one of the doctors I was consulting recommended I try Tirzepatide, which is a dual GIP and GLP-1 receptor agonist and goes by the names Mounjaro or Zepbound. He called it, “a painkiller for hunger.” I laughed and said no. I got on my high horse about not using caffeine, or alcohol, or anything. I had even stopped taking any supplements. This year I’ve had 7 alcoholic drinks, down from approximately 1,000 in 2022. I wasn’t interested in going down that path. Plus I hate – emphasis on hate – needles. He pushed back on me and told me I should start reading the studies on it to make an informed decision. I agreed to start reading up.
As I did, my position softened. It became clear that while there are tradeoffs (side effects) to every decision, the benefit of quieting hunger seemed large and the tradeoffs seemed mild and well-studied at scale. His argument to me was that I had already lost a significant amount of weight by rebuilding my habits, so I was in a far better position to sustain any additional weight loss after going off of it. I was lifting weights consistently and eating high protein, which guards against muscle loss. He said I was an excellent candidate for it to be successful.
I gave it a go, and, well, it worked as advertised. I kept doing what I had been doing, but that deep ache was quieted down. I’m still hungry often, but I’ve stopped thinking about food all the time. In the absence of near-constant pain, my body relaxed. The biggest tradeoff I experienced was in my exercise performance. By keeping your glucose levels within a narrow range, it eliminates your body’s ability to dump glucose into your system during high-intensity exercise. It felt like I lost my 5th gear. Honestly, it sucks, but thankfully I’m not performing for anyone but me.
I broke through 200 lbs, then 190 lbs recently. I’m about 7-9 lbs from my original goal and plan to start coming off tirzepatide soon, which I suspect isn’t easy or straightforward. System 2 will be roaring and I’ll have to readjust to a lower basal metabolic rate. I can’t wait to get my 5th gear back. Although I’m not on social media much these days, I’ll try to share how that’s going.
As an aside, I’m not encouraging anyone to go on Tirzepatide, or any medication. And, I’m certainly not encouraging someone to do so without first renovating their lifestyle, exercise, and eating habits. It’s a powerful tool, but not a magic cure-all. In fact, the body of evidence clearly shows that if you go on these drugs and don’t make lifestyle changes first (lift heavy things, eat plenty of protein), you’ll likely lose a disturbingly large percentage of muscle as your weight loss. This will set you up to be lighter, but far weaker. And, if you regain the weight, you’ll end up at a much higher body fat percentage at the same weight than before you started.
My goal ultimately is both quality and quantity of life, and while this hasn’t always been an enjoyable experience, I believe I am significantly better off where I am than where I started.
What I Learned About Health
I’ve had quite a few people reach out and ask me what I’ve learned along the way. Here’s a short summary in hopes that it helps someone out there who is ready to get started.
Note: I’m a sample size of 1, have no fancy degree in anything including exercise physiology, am not trying to sell you anything, am not sure everything below is completely correct, and didn’t even stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
It’s Slow — Unless you’re the first human to break the laws of thermodynamics (which I thought I was for a long time), to lose a pound of fat, you have to under-eat by 3500 calories. And, your body has to preferentially burn all of that as fat, as opposed to muscle, which is rare. A 500 calorie per day deficit is a pound per week. Everything else is water-weight. I’ve found that a deficit of 500 calories per day is about the limit of what can feel sustainably normal. More deficit than that is going to feel hard. I can only do a 750-1000 calories per day deficit for 4-6 days. Then I need a break, even on Tirzepatide.
Lift Heavy, Eat Protein — Assuming you’re in a calorie deficit, to get your body to preferentially burn a higher ratio of fat to muscle requires you to lift heavy things (whatever heavy is for you) and eat plenty of protein. It’s a signal to your body that the most metabolically expensive tissue (muscle) is worth keeping. My experience is that 3 days per week of lifting has gotten great results, but 2 days per week keeps me from losing ground. But, it’s personal. Progressive overload with compound movements has the biggest effect. I aimed to average 180 grams/day of protein (1 gram/day x target body weight), but didn’t always hit it.
Count Calories, Until You Know — I’m allergic to structure and systems, so the idea of counting calories for the rest of my life was a non-starter. But, I did count calories 3 separate times, each for about 3 weeks, and it was revelatory. It’s one thing to know in theory that there are 400 calories in 3 ounces of pistachios. It’s another to grab a small handful of pistachios and realize you just ate 400 calories. Within a short period of time I was able to eyeball my calories in a way that made me conscious of what I was eating and made me realize how frequently I overate.
Measure Glucose, Until You Know — A big part of keeping hunger in check is making sure I don’t spike/crash my blood glucose. I used Levels once for two weeks to eat normally and see how different foods/exercise affected me. The biggest takeaway was how food order seemed to matter (protein first helped a ton) and how much standing or walking affected post-food glucose spikes compared with sitting. I started eating protein first, incorporating a standing desk at work with a treadmill underneath it, and walking whenever I can.
Sweat Every Day — My friend Shane Parrish convinced me that it’s easier to do something 100% of the time than 80% of the time. 23 months ago I decided that I was going to do something active every single day, no exceptions. A 20-minute walk counts. Just be active. Prior to that, I worked out at most once a week, and hated every minute of it. Now my body craves movement.
Quit Negative Self-Talk — I used to joke that I was a “fat kid.” I remember where I was as a 9-year-old when someone called me that, and it stuck. Identity drives behavior. That identity made/allowed me to do stupid stuff like binge eat, because that’s what fat kids do. My friend Patrick lovingly told me to knock it off. He said that’s not who I am and asked me why I kept saying it. I didn’t have a good answer. It was a huge wake-up call.
Cardio Matters, With Caveats — I keep hearing that cardio is a poor way to lose fat, but good for longevity. Also, cardio can burn a lot of calories, but it’s hard outside a lab to measure exactly how many – and my anecdotal evidence is that fitness trackers considerably over-count. During bouts of long exercise, there’s a gap in expected calories burned and what is practically observed called Exercise Energy Compensation. Bottom line…it’s confusing. Having done a LOT of cardio, here’s where I have landed — 30-60 minutes of hard cardio is an excellent appetite suppressant and helps my body feel much better. Beyond that, it’s still “healthy” but I’ve noticed a compensatory response with hunger that diminishes the fat-loss benefits. I’d build in intense cardio (running, biking, swimming, etc.) a couple times a week and see what you notice.
Supplements, Toxins, Heat/Cold, Red Light Therapy — Over the last couple years I’ve had well-meaning friends recommend all kinds of supplements and techniques that they say helped them, and I’m sure they did. From what I’ve read and observed myself, heat/cold exposure, supplements, and reducing exposure to toxins can and do matter, but they’re the final 5-10%. If you’re focused on these, make sure you’ve already nailed diet, exercise, and sleep.
Sleep Matters — There’s tons of evidence on this. Seems almost like common knowledge at this point. Anecdotally, everything gets easier with good sleep. It’s worth prioritizing. Go dark, cool, and quiet. I use an Eight Sleep and love it.
Fasting Works, But Not How I Expected — You know the quickest way to drop weight? Stop eating. I did quite a few 36-hour fasts, four 3-day fasts, two 5-day fasts, and one 7-day fast. All of them resulted in me feeling food-focused, depleted, and irritable. I lost a little weight, but not as much as expected. My body would get lethargic and stressed. The more research I’ve done, the less I think fasting is beneficial long-term for fat loss, or more precisely, the less I think that the benefits outweigh the costs because of associated muscle loss. But, what fasting did was adjust how I viewed hunger. I realized that not being full isn’t hunger and normal hunger, like skipping a meal, isn’t a big deal or dangerous, and shouldn’t create anxiety.
Seek Support — 2 years of trying to “get fit” felt like an eternity. My hope is that I sustain this for the rest of my life. There’s no way I could have done it for long without friendships, community, and help. But to get help, you have to be vulnerable and honest. Some days I screwed up and gorged myself. Other days I felt terrible and didn’t want to work out. Feeling discouraged is going to come up often. Alex Maples, who recently joined Permanent Equity as our Director of Health and Fitness, has been there every step of the way and deserves a lot of credit.
Grace Not Shame — It took me a long time to gain weight, and I had 40 years of entrenched habits. When I started trying to get fit, I wanted it quick. That led to frustration when my old habits weren’t gone and I couldn’t tell a difference in the mirror. It took a solid year to completely reset my habits, and it has only been recently that people have even noticed that I’ve lost some weight (look up the paper towel roll effect). My advice is to go slow, set low expectations, and just try to get a little fitter every day.
I’m sure I’m wrong on half of this stuff. But, I’d encourage you to eat the fish and spit out the bones. Cheers and hope it's helpful!
